Yesterday was not a good day for the floor in the back room of The Grocery Store. Nope. It was a messy, wet, sad day for that floor. I'm sure that it's had a lot more of these days since I started working at the salad bar.
Of course the messiest one was all my own fault.
I tried to carry too much, and I knew it too. As I piled stuff together in order to pick it up I told myself, ‘Self,’ (we often have these conversations,) 'Self, you’re going to drop something, and I can bet that that something you’re going to drop is the container of bacon bits which will pop open and spray all over the floor.’
Unfortunately, I should have listened to me...
It was a red-letter day. I thought nothing could top dropping a huge chunk of ice which shattered and sprayed bits and pieces all over the floor, but I was wrong.
Of course, neither of these things comes close to the hat-rack fiasco. But, that's another story for another day.
Love ya,
~ Jen
1. If I only have a little of something left, people will demolish it. It doesn't matter if they haven't touched it with a ten-foot pole on other days, it will be gone in ten seconds flat and I'll have to refill it five seconds after setting up the salad bar.
2. People. Are. Messy. And I do mean disgustingly messy. I suppose they figure that someone else *coughhack *me* coughhack* will come and clean up behind them so it doesn't matter if they spray parmesan cheese all over the bacon bits and three salads deep on the other side of the saladbar.
3. If I'm low on containers and we can't find them anywhere in the back of the store because my manager never ordered them, people will smell it like blood in the water and flock to the salad bar so they can complain to the managers about how badly run it is.
4. Untensils migrate. You would think that it wouldn't be difficult for someone to figure out that a utensil is meant to be used for the food it's placed in, but apparently that's much too mentally taxing for some people. They just don't understand why you can't use the cottage cheese spoon to scoop out strawberries. ::shudder::
5. Utensils walk. Now this one I really, truly, do not understand. Why in the world someone would want to walk off with tongs or a large salad bar spoon, I will never know.
Our salad bar prices things by the pound.
$5.99 to be exact.
No, I'm not kidding.
Yes, it's ridiculously expensive.
Yes, people will pay for it.
Occasionally.
Which leads me to rule number six of the salad bar:
6. If someone's put too much stuff in their salad bar container, apparently not noticing the $5.99/lb sign (which is very large, and obnoxious, and therefore, difficult to miss) it is perfectly acceptable to stow said salad behind things, on a shelf, in another part of the store, where it won't be found until the night crew stocks the shelves, and it will have ample opportunity to get throroughly disgusting. Lovely.
